16 February 2007

Lady of Leisure has convinced me that I need to be a little more sociable and I have reluctantly agreed to attend a Valentines Ball in the Hilton Hotel. We will be meeting members of the first wives club and their respective husbands, all of whom know each other, and I will be very much the outsider. I have been assured that despite the black tie reference on the ticket, Jamaica casual custom means that one would look ridiculously out of place. As I park the car, I notice our table mates crossing the carpark and all treh males are dressed in Black tie finery. Lady of Leisure will fit right in with what she is wearing, I on the other hand am wearing a light gray brushed cotton suit and open necked shirt. It is not an auspicious start to the evening and I am left very self conscious feeling very much the outsider.

I always find in socially awkward situations, alcohol is either a great social lubricant or failing that a suitable refuge. The tickets for the evening included a free bar and though the wine was like cough medicine, the gin and tonics were fine. Ties and tongues were loosened and before too long the boys in the black tie finery looked just as scruffy as me.

The gins must have been stronger than I imagined as at some point in the evening I was coaxed out to the dance floor, a place I have studiously avoided since making a complete fool of myself at he Ginger Ninja’s wedding.

The highlight of the evening was a silent auction, of which only one painting interested me. I found myself in a bidding war with 2 other members of my table plus one person unknown. The gin gave me a steely determination, along with a rather casual attitude to the money I was bidding.

I won, however I was astute / alert enough to see that one of my competitors was quite upset. She and her husband are leaving Jamaica shortly having served their sentence, and they really wanted the painting as a memento. Being ever so generous, I retracted my last bid and the winner defaulted to them.

I wish I hadn’t, the painting really was pretty good, and I am never likely to meet these people again in my life. Bah Humbug!